Turning back to God

I’ve always kept quiet,

because I’m afraid that no one will answer

I’ve never struggled,

Because I know that this world is big

Too much time wasted,

Too many problems to face,

Too much I don’t want to care

Too many difficulties,

Too many unrests to know what is right from wrong

Who am I next to you

The smallest of me,

Have big dreams,

Time to walk ahead there is a way….


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To know that God catches me is all that I’ll ever ask for. Growing up and living in chaos has been the norm for me. Until I decided that this isn’t the life that I want anymore. And so I took a turn, and plunge right into open waters. Not knowing where I am going or where I will be. Still, I trusted, in that still small voice.

Every family has problems of their own. We all learn to love and to forgive, to bear with each other patiently. Mistakes are part of growing up, and we get better at it each time we fail. No one is perfect, and we should never strive to be. To love unconditionally takes a lot of strength, courage, and willingness. We learn to love because its who we are meant to be.Dear Jesus,

Thank you for loving me more than I deserve. You died for me, and now I live. Because you saved me from my deepest darkness. I believe it is your dearest mother who waved to me in her favourite blue. Her warm blue presence that made my heart melt. Her radiant glow shining ever so brightly. I think I met her before I know you. So thank you, dear Jesus, for coming after me. For chasing after me, and never letting me go. Thank you for never giving up on me, and telling me that everything is gonna be okay.

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Amelia,

Your poor and unworthy servant

Part 1- Making a difference

Making a difference
in this life of ours

“Be not afraid,” was what Jesus says very often. To live in fear is a horrible feeling, and I know how it feels like. Fear, is also the opposite of Love.

“Make the most of what you have, with what little you have. Everyday is a new day, live life to the fullest, ” were the words I once told myself. Growing up during my teenage years were the most challenging. I experienced heartaches, disappointments, and the most painful of all – the betrayal of a human heart. I learnt that to protect myself, I need not be true to the other.

Because I was hurt, I decided to take life easily, to seek freedom, and to do the things that I wanted. Because being good and obedient doesn’t take me to places, and so I rebelled. Doing things to spite another, out of hate, out of love. I didn’t even know what love means anymore. So I went from people to people, and places to places, searching for this ‘antidote’ to fill the void within.

Thank God I’m a fighter, and didn’t give up easily. And so my journey continued in searching, and seeking…till this restless heart could take it no longer.

Stay tuned forĀ Part 2: Following the call

Love, Amelia
Aspiring Writer & Artist

First published on 9th November 2015